Never a Sane Animal

What can I say? My grandparents’ have never had a sane animal. They had a cat that would suck on the end of its tail until one day my grandpa (and I think my uncle or someone) put hot sauce on the end of it and damn near burnt the cat’s mouth.

They had a bird that lived up to its name, Sapass (Sap for short) and I was one of the few people that he wouldn’t bite. Sap used to fly off his cage all the time and would try to bite you if you tried to pick him up. One day he flew off his cage and I was the closest person and went to pick him up. He tried to bite me and I lightly hit the tip of his beak. I startled him to the point that he didn’t know what to do other than get on my finger so that I could put him back on his perch. He would always snap and hiss but then think about it and get up on my finger without really trying to bite me. I was the one who found him dead in his cage after we noticed that he wasn’t looking too well on that Fourth of July. My cousins had made my uncle build a coffin for Sap and he is buried in the back yard along with a lot of their other pets.

I remember quite a few of their animals and I think the horses have always been the closest to normal that their animals have gotten and the horses have always been strange as well. They had another cat that would run really, really fast through the house until all of a sudden you would hear this loud thump on the hall door and you knew the cat has lost its grip on the floor and slammed into the door. My mom said that he would stumble around a little bit after that. Choo Choo is buried in the front yard. Both the front and back yards have quite a few beloved pets that are buried.

Sophie was basically a rescue dog. Our neighbor’s sister found her wandering around on the street. She didn’t have a collar on and was slightly wet like she had just gotten a bath. Tommy brought her to the house and showed her to us. They put ads in the paper and spread it around town. Nobody ever claimed her. Tommy was about to take the cocker spaniel to the pound and my mom asked if my grandparents could see the dog. Sophie really stayed with Pa and they adopted her. When ever Pa had to leave town for a doctor’s appointment and didn’t take her, she would ignore him for a week. I’m not sure how long they had her before she got sick and had to be put to sleep. I still remember my mom having to tell me and we didn’t know that Ma and Pa had left her in front of the fireplace while they dug the hole in the back yard for her. She was a good dog. We called her Sophie because she kind of perked up when we were trying to guess her name. I miss Sophie.

It wasn’t too long after Sophie that they got Abigail; another cocker spaniel. She travelled about 2000 miles to be with us and for the longest time, she would not leave her kennel. Abby is literally a scaredy cat. She has warmed up to various things but still gets spooked easily. She’s weird. That’s the only way to describe this animal. She still growls at bags and used to growl at luggage. Abby knows the sound of my brother’s truck and has her nose plastered to the glass door when he comes over. She’s always looking for someone to play with and will steal your chair if you’re not careful.

Tonight I was over at Ma and Pa’s house and Ma said that I needed to see what Abby does when she gets up in the chair with her. We waited until finally Abby got up there and did this:

She truly is a strange dog. It doesn’t take much to entertain her. We’ve tried teaching her how to play fetch. She know that she has to go get the ball or toy, but she’s won’t bring it back to you. Instead she runs away from you. She’s really funny when she really starts running. She puts her butt almost to the floor. If she sits on your lap she either sits with her back straighter than any human’s or she is lying on you arm. Yes I wrote on your arm. If she’s not lying on it, most of the time she will have at least her paw over it. She gets comfortable in the most awkward positions we have ever seen. As weird and funny as she is, we wouldn’t trade her for anything.

I keep telling Ma that they have never had a sane animal and she agrees. We have loved each and every one of them.

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One thought on “Never a Sane Animal

  1. You forgot about the lamb (newborn to about 2 months old) that was raised in the house along with a rooster. Yes…you read that right! The rooster loved going for car rides. There was a guinea pig that just loved having his neck rubbed and made a funny squeaking noise. The dog that loved his beer. He stole one from a fisherman! The dobie that drug his doghouse down the street. The doghouse weighed at least a hundred or more pounds! There have been other animals, but those are the most memorable of the lot.

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