How to Get Out of Your Own Way

I started reading How to Get Out of Your Own Way by Tyrese Gibson last night and did not want to put it down when my eyes got droopy with sleepiness. I keep telling myself that I am going to focus on me this year and what I can do now to achieve my dreams and goals in life.

“…to hold on to the past limits your future.” (Chapter 1)

 It’s amazing to me that Tyrese had gone through all of this to get where he is today and he’s only three years older than me.

“…whatever happened yesterday is over. Today is a new day. So many people are submerged in what was, they don’t even focus on now. They don’t focus on the future. Every time they look back they cry and have all this pain about their past.” (Chapter 1)

I relate to this like Tyrese wrote it for me. I have written on my blog about my past and the bullying that I endured. I still cry about the pain that is caused, and still do, but at the same time, I wouldn’t change it if I was even given the opportunity to go back to that point in my life. I believe that the emotional torture and mental breakdown that I received from my peers made the person I am today. My only regret is that I have blocked out a lot of my childhood wherever the bullying occurred so I don‘t really remember too much about the bullying. I know it happened but I cannot repeat all of the name-calling and what-not verbatim.

Tyrese had a few people outside his family that became mentors to him. I think everyone does. For me, Mr. Young, my fifth grade teacher, always stands out. He forced me to believe in myself and see my potential. My parents put me in a new school after fifth grade because of the bullying that I received and refused to let me stay with that group of children. I believe that going to Round Valley Elementary School saved me. I still received some bullying but nothing like I was getting.

Photo by Stack Klemm, Stacie Klemm Photography, October 2009

Because of all the bullying that I received, I still am dealing with self-esteem issues even though this all happened fifteen or more years ago. Having only been on one date in my life as I am nine months away from turning 30, doesn’t help. So many of my peers called me ugly and worthless, that today I have a hard time seeing a beautiful young woman when I look in the mirror. I know am, but I cannot see it.

“Your actions reflect what you want for yourself and what you feel you deserve.” (Chapter 2)

I know that I deserve more in my life and I am currently working towards bettering my life. I want to be happy and successful and I know that I can do it. I know that my hopes and dreams will not be automatic and that things take time. Lucky for me I can be a very patient person.

I am loving Tyrese’s book so much right now and I encourage people to pick it and read it. Thank you Tyrese for opening up and exposing who you are for all of us to understand that we may not, and are not, alone in the challenges that life throws in our way. You truly have motivated me to reach out and chase my dreams.


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